Roll Softly and Carry a Big Stick

The Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) mandates that all people riding public transportation in a wheelchair need to be secured. Often, if I am traveling only a short distance I will try to talk the bus driver out of tethering me down; but the best drivers will always insist on buckling us in. I always viewed it as a manner of protecting us, the disabled; but one driver explained it very succinctly one time: "If I have to slam on my brakes, I don't want you to come flying down the aisle and hitting me!" It made sense, and I started imagining scenarios where there could be even a very minor traffic accident, but with my chair not fully secured, it could cause some serious injuries to those passengers around me.

Well, today I was on the way to my neurologist at the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center; this medical complex is huge. It has a medical school, four hospitals, and many professional medical office buildings. It is a very busy place, so all of the six or so different bus routes that serve it are always jammed full of passengers. Today after I got into my place, I was trying to secure myself with one of the seat belts, but am always unable to reach the one belt on the floor. The bus driver was completely ignoring me so this woman started to help me and made the comment that he (the driver) just wasn't going to get up and help me. He took off with me untethered and the woman still standing in the aisle. At the next stop I requested his help and he yelled at me and then got up and started chewing me out saying that the belts didn't work. Well, there are three separate ways to secure the chair, and there are two wheelchair areas, so I wasn't believing that all six seat belt or hook & tether systems weren't working. I even pointed out to him the obviously functional ones in the area across from me. During this time I could hear people saying stuff about me, one lady complaining she would be late for work, and other rude comments. While I understood where she was coming from, I saw the bigger picture.

Well, before I knew it I had turned around and began yelling at a bus full of passengers! I couldn't believe it. I knew that this could be a dangerous move on part (given the neighborhood and some of the passengers on board), and I also knew that I was just adding fuel to the fire but I seemed to be on automatic pilot. All I heard was my voice yelling at them, "Look! I'm already in a wheelchair, I have nothing to lose! I'm trying to protect you guys!!! If something happens and I go flying, YOU are the ones that are going to get injured. I'm already damaged. What more could happen to me?! So stop talking about me behind my back!!" As soon as I finished I expected an outpouring of laughter and ridicule, but there was just silence. There were no more rude and impatient remarks. I was shocked that they actually seemed impressed and listened to me. Most likely they were shocked that the "disabled woman" wasn't as meek and frail as they thought she was!

The funniest part was when one of the men I was especially yelling at later made his way to the seat nearest me and started talking to me. He apologized for being nosy as he asked if he had just seen me on television (I had just been on a local station a few days before, so I groaned and thought that's what he was talking about). Then he said, "Aren't you the woman whose ex-husband shot her?!" I answered that I was not. Then he apologized again and asked me if I had just come back from Iraq, was I a disabled vet? I told him no and bluntly told him I had multiple sclerosis and left it at that. It was only hours later that I saw the humor in his questions. Evidently my angry tirade at the passengers on the bus left them with only two possible scenarios for a disabled person who would do such a thing: I was either a woman who could provoke her husband to shoot her or I was a injured soldier back from fighting in a war!!

See, even if you do have a physical handicap, you can still make people believe that you are a strong and aggressive woman! :-) I think it's hilarious. Normally, I would have been horrified that people would view me in any way less than that of a soft, feminine lady; but to be honest it was a nice refreshing change from being viewed as a helpless "cripple".

Dallas is a large city, but maybe my reputation will precede me and the rumors will grow: That's HER!!! She's the woman that killed a man with her bare hands, even AFTER he ran her over with his Hummer and broke both of her legs! LOL

Just remember, everyone has some sort of handicap, in some shape and form. But more importantly, no matter what handicap someone may have there is still a part of us that is strong and is able to take of ourselves, no matter what.